I Mean Quite Literally...

..."You can't make this shit up.":

Mount Everest Is Now Covered In Human Poop Thanks To Sloppy Climbers

For Those Of You...

...Canucks who suffer from our proverbial inferiority complex, this is one way to get noticed:


Community Fears 80-Ton Blue Whale Carcass Will Explode on its Shore


Bloated whale carcass could explode in Canadian town, locals fear

Canadian town worried rotting blue whale will explode on beach

Rotting blue whale carcass worrying Canadian fishing village

Help with beached whales

Newfoundland town worried washed up blue whale will explode

A Whale Of A Problem: Town Faces Threat Of Exploding Carcass

Blue whale carcass raises a stink in Newfoundland

Yes, Beached Whales Really Do Explode

I like history, but not this much:

A Brief History of Exploding Whales

"It happens! Pretty often, actually. And the results are ... really, really gross."

[---]

"Jack Lawson, a scientist affiliated with the Canadian fisheries department, told the media that his main concern was neither the stench nor the possibility of an explosion. He warned that the worst thing would be for a person to get too close to the whale and fall inside it: “The [whale] skin is starting to lose its integrity and if someone were to walk along, say, the chin — that is full of all that gas — they could fall in the whale. The insides will be liquefied. Retrieving them would be very difficult.""

What Would Little Miss...

...Muffet think of this?

Too Much Information

"Elephants, antelopes and horses are among modern animals who defecate in socially agreed hotspots - to mark territory and reduce the spread of parasites.

But their best efforts are dwarfed by the enormous scale of this latrine - which breaks the previous record "oldest toilet" by 220 million years.

Fossil "coprolites" as wide as 40cm and weighing several kilograms were found in seven massive patches across the Chanares Formation in La Rioja province.

Some were sausage-like, others pristine ovals...

Giant prehistoric toilet unearthed in colours ranging from whitish grey to dark brown-violet."

One In Four...

...I think we're outnumbered:



Not withstanding what they do with all that poop, I think the best beetles are the ones that go CRUNCH when you step on them and the worst one's are water beetles.

Well, I Guess...

...I'll have to stop, then:

Eating Goan frog legs could cause cancer

What Do Men Want?

Besides that, I mean.

One of these, perhaps? Or these?

A little bit of this and that?

Some male bonding maybe?

And food. Don't forget food, no matter what its consequences.

/sarc

For Dave

Only Dave knows why.



Did you feel that wind pass by?

(This blog has officially reached a new low. If you don't like it, you can always watch the scandals unfolding on either side of the 49th. This is just pixels on a screen. The scandals are just democracy burning up, that's all.)

Santa Shoulda Gone On A Diet

Man’s body found in London chimney

Of Course...

...we have to have our spring blizzard, don't we?

Just when you thought the interminable winter was almost over.

AAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!

The Perv Must Have Gotten...

...tired of cutting people's feet off:

4th headless sea lion found on Vancouver Island beach

On The Ides Of March

Reuters journalist charged with conspiring with hacker group Anonymous

Surprise. Surprise.

No favouritism for Hubich: CUPE shop steward

Oh my. Is Saskatchewan's labour movement falling apart under its chief goon, Larry Hubick? Sure hope so. Mr. Hubick is your garden variety Union goon. Perhaps the gig is up, Larry. What a great legacy you will leave! RTWT.

Knight's remains found in parking lot

Betcha his shining armour ain't so shiny after all these years. Har. Har.

Toronto lawyer Clayton Ruby to appeal Rob Ford conflict-of-interest decision

I sure hope this shyster looses. The left is going down and it's costing them a lot of money. They just don't seem to understand that Ford himself in not the issue. The issue is the integrity of free and fair elections, which they have a habit of losing.

Muslim convert from BBC documentary pleads guilty to terrorism charges

"A Muslim convert who featured in a BBC3 documentary in 2011 about Islamism has pleaded guilty to terrorism charges at the Old Bailey."

[---]

"Richard Dart, 29, admitted plotting a terror attack in Royal Wootton Bassett and planning to target members of the security services including "M15 or M16 heads" after receiving training at terrorism camps in Pakistan." [Emphasis mine]

It's hard to know where to begin on this one. Let's just say, I think this says a lot about disaffected Westerners who defend Islamism and hurl the accusation of Islamofascism around. Civilization and its malcontents!

Hundreds more dead pigs found in Chinese river

"Shanghai locals fear water contamination after more than 7,000 carcasses removed from Huangpu"

[---]

"Shanghai locals fear water contamination after more than 7,000 carcasses removed from Huangpu"

[---]

"The dead pigs are believed to be come from farms upstream in the Jiaxing area in neighbouring Zhejiang province. A surge in pig dumping has followed police campaigns against the sale of pork products made from diseased pigs."

Not quite the same as "Shoot. Shovel. and Shut up!", is it. Yuk. Beware the Ides of March!

Can you imagine China without pork products?

And if that wasn't enough to turn your stomach, lets have a chalice of wine, as we remember old Julius!

And if that still wasn't enough, IT'S STILL SNOWING HERE!! I haven't got to the stage where I want to shoot myself, but an extra chalice or two of whine seems in order. (Pun intended, because I'm so funny.)

We Humans...

...are destroying the earth, I tell you:

Brazilian Bikini Waxes Make Crab Lice Endangered Species: Health

"Pubic lice, the crab-shaped insects that have dwelled in human groins since the beginning of history, are disappearing. Doctors say bikini waxing may be the reason.

Waning infestations of the bloodsuckers have been linked by doctors to pubic depilation, especially a technique popularized in the 1990s by a Manhattan salon run by seven Brazilian sisters. More than 80 percent of college students in the U.S. remove all or some of their pubic hair -- part of a trend that’s increasing in western countries. In Australia, Sydney’s main sexual health clinic hasn’t seen a woman with pubic lice since 2008 and male cases have fallen 80 percent from about 100 a decade ago."

And we're gonna have to come up with a different excuse if we're caught scratchin'. It's enough to drive you crazy.

AARRRRRRGGGHHHH!

Being a milk freak, and having run out of milk a couple of days ago, I just had to go out onto the freakin' wintery streets and downtown to the grocery store. I can't believe how much snow there is on the ground!! And it's still falling!!!! 'sposed to warm up and quit snowing in a few days, but I'm sure that will just make the streets icy.

Global warming, where are you?

I'm A Dog

Mutts for Mozart: Study finds dogs dig classical, are stressed by metal

Especially the "stressed by metal" part.

Typical Hollywood Fare

Lee Daniels went into The Paperboy with a ‘No rehearsals. Let’s just do it’ attitude

"On the second (day of filming), the crew filmed a graphic sex scene. And on the third, to alleviate a jellyfish sting, Bless must urinate on her young suitor (played by Zac Efron)."

Yesterday, I was listening to a discussion on the radio about a controversial trend to serve liquor at movie theatres. I thought to myself, this is what Hollywood has done to itself. In addition to things like Netflix and DVDs, etc., movie theatres are going the way of the dinosaur because Hollywood has stopped producing decent movies. Consequently, theatres are reduced to turning their establishments into saloons.

According to the people discussing the topic, traditional theatres will still be available. Thank God. I was thinking, before they told us that, who wants to sit in a theatre where the loud drunken lout sitting behind you pukes on your shoulder and booze hucksters are cruising up and down the aisles plying their wares like the folks who sell popcorn and peanuts at a ball game.

Oh well. I rarely watch movies, anyway. Way too much garbage out there and the local theatre here in town gets only the garbage.

Some Little Secrets

WARNING GUYS. "SENSITIVE" TOPICS AHEAD!

This topic has been served up on Google.news.ca:

Is PMS a myth?

I think it is. The only thing I experienced in the last few days of my cycle was headaches, fatigue, cramps and general ukkiness, but no mood swings, bloating or anything like that.

And that little spike in amourousness that's supposed to occur mid-cycle? Nope. 'fraid not. For some strange reason, said spike occurred during my period.

All I can say, is thank God that's over.

PS: I think I can safely say, I have now covered everything in this blog.

Dear Lamestream Media...

....I don't care if Justin Bieber puked while on stage.  I'm not interested in baby starlets, or for that matter, even adult starlets. But Bieber is a human being, and as such, I think he deserves some dignity. Give it a rest, will you?

Heavy sigh!

This is one of the main reason I cancelled my cable subscription several years ago and put my TV in storage. I'm certain I will never go back. You seem intent of keeping us uninformed and feeding us syrupy pap. Sorry. Not interested.

So, You Think You've Had...

..a shitty day, do you? Well, let me tell you about the shittiest day I've ever had. It happened when I was still living in Saskatoon. I was walking in the park by the Bessborough, when a piece of fresh, steaming bird poop landed on my shoulder. It made me chuckle. Still does.

Could have been worse, I suppose. It might have landed in my hair. Or I might have been looking up with my mouth open.

Always look on the bright side!!

God, I'm pathetic! This is all I've got to blog about???

Yuk

British Boy Stumbles Upon Extremely Valuable Whale Vomit